Meet the Machines

There are a lot of places out there that review games, but one thing I've noticed is that very few of them discuss what sort of computer they are using to play the games they review. This is actually fairly important, as how software behaves is largely dependent on what resources are available. Most children will be using outdated, cheap, or hand-me-down systems, so they won't get the same experience as someone using a powerful machine.

By listing the machines used and their specs, anyone can see what works and what didn't. This makes it easier to gauge if their own computers are strong enough to run the software.

It's actually a common practice to give a nickname to a computer. Households with only one or two computers can usually use phrases like "the laptop" or "John's computer" to identify their machines, and that's fine. However, sometimes you need to use something more direct to identify which system you're talking about. For example, I have three computers that I use to review games. If I was to say I used "the desktop computer", would you know which machine I used? Most likely not, since two of my computers are desktop machines.

As for how the names are chosen, that's up to their owners, and a lot of people chose to have some fun with it. Businesses with scores of machines usually use a naming convention of some sort: common examples include characters from a specific TV show, popular foods or drinks, famous actors, and planets.

After some debate, I ended up deciding to name my computers after Catholic saints. The reason for this choice is that it more or less fit the theme of my website, and let me include a little whimsy, as you can see below.

Status: Retired as of 2020 Model: Toshiba DX730 series All-in-One RAM: 4 GB Graphics Card: Generic, integrated Operating System: Windows 7 Home Premium XUbuntu Linux First came online: 2011 Special features: Also used as a monitor Namesake: St. Martha, patron saint of domestic workers

Martha was purchased in something of a hurry. The previous computer had suddenly suffered a hard drive crash, and I was in the middle of things (including an event in an online game), so we hurried to the store and purchased Martha that very evening. Martha is in many ways superior to the machine it replaced, but it was still slightly outdated when we bought it. Despite its age and limited resources, this system is still suitable for most games out there. The main drawback has been the integrated graphics card, which can't handle games that require more power. That said, I've moved to using Thaddeus as the main computer, leaving Martha to handle other tasks. This computer was named after St. Martha, who is the patron saint of domestic workers. Like your typical office machine, this system isn't a gaming computer; its primary focus is getting work done. It's also not as capable as the computers available in stores today, so it works as an example of the sort of computer a child would be given. In February 2020, Martha was retired as a gaming system and switched over to a fresh installation of XUbuntu Linux. She is now primarily used as a development webserver and miniture "cloud" system to help coordinate the other systems.

Status: Active Model: Custom built RAM: 16 GB (initally 8 GB) Graphics Card: Sapphire Radeon R9 280 Operating System: Windows 10 Pro First came online: 2015 Special features: Powerful cooling system with a huge heat sink and five internal fans Namesake: St. Jude Thaddeus, patron saint of lost causes

Thaddeus was my first attempt at building a computer on my own. The parts were selected from an online guide, which likely made the entire endeavor much easier than it could have been. Once they had all arrived in the mail, I was able to assemble most of the unit over the course of a single evening. However, I did end up running into problems I couldn't solve on my own, and so I swallowed my pride and took the unit to a local computer repair store. It turned out to be a simple mistake on my part, and Thaddeus was ready to come home within an hour. The reason it was named after the patron saint of lost causes is that, thanks to the graphics card, cooling system and other internals, Thaddeus is more powerful than most computers you can buy from a computer store. This ultimately means that Thaddeus can be used to run software that would otherwise be a lost cause.

Status: Active Model: HP Laptop 14-FQ0013DX RAM: 4 GB Graphics Card: Generic, integrated Operating System: Windows 11 Home First came online: 2020 Special features: Portable workstation Namesake: St. Giles, patron saint of the disabled

As time has gone on, it's become increasingly neccisary for me to be away from my desk for part of the day. This not only makes it difficult to play games, but it also means I lose a lot of valuable time to work on God Minded Gaming and other projects I have going. Thus, in late 2020, I purchased an inexpensive laptop to help me work on the go. Giles has similar hardware to Martha, but there are several disadvantages when it comes to using it for gaming. The biggest of these are its unusually small screen resolution and miniscule hard drive capacity. Because of these unique limitations, I've opted to name it after St. Giles, the patron saint of the disabled and the handicapped. While this might sound insulting, Giles have proven itself to be a welcome "member" of the team.

Status: Active Model: Meta Quest 2 (128 GB) First came online: 2022 Special features: Virtual Reality Headset Namesake: St. Clare of Assisi, Patron Saint of Television

In late 2021, I injured my shoulder while working on an offline hobby. This made it difficult for me to play many video games, as I couldn't use the mouse without aggrivating the injury. After some debate, I decided it was time to start exploring virtual reality, as more and more games either support a VR headset or are exclusively designed for them. Virtual reality headsets are extremely expensive, and after weighing all the options, I ended up choosing the cheaper version of the Oculus Quest 2 headset (now rebranded as the Meta Quest 2) in January 2022. While it took some getting used to, I've become comfortable enough with using it to start including VR games in my reviews. I chose to name the headset after St. Clare, as she is the Patron Saint of Television, and headsets like the Oculus Quest 2 work by shoving two small screens against your eyeballs. Now, it may sound crazy for a woman who lived centuries before the television was invented to be its patron, but there's a legend that explains it. When St. Clare was bedridden and unable to attend Mass in person, the Holy Spirit enabled her to hear the service and see it on the wall of her room. Thus, she was able to participate in Mass remotely.